Maintaining Strength and Wellbeing
There is an essential human-ness in all of us that means we are fluid, never static, our needs shifting all the time depending on the seasons of our feelings, energy levels, etc. To ignore our needs (be they more sleep, a walk, a coffee with a friend) is to forget to nourish ourselves; it's a failure to replenish the resources and energy we need to feel strong, alert, and alive enough to be (every day) how we want to be in ourselves, and our dealings with others.
I am a carer, business woman, mother, and a wife (among other things). They are not 'who I am' but the roles I play on a daily basis. What happens to my ability to fulfil those roles if I neglect to pay attention to my physical and emotional wellbeing? There is a great misconception in our society; that is the idea that looking after ourselves is a selfish thing to do. Somehow, this creates a situation where a lot of people don't look after themselves at all.
Even when sought support - for the first time admitting that perhaps I wasn't superwoman - I didn't feel able to take that step for me, my motivation was the happiness of others: I knew that my chronically ill partner felt like more of a burden if I ended the day completely shattered, and I knew that I had less energy for my sons than I wanted to have. So it was only when I was in the middle of the process of caring for myself that I realised how important and powerful looking after oneself could be, and started doing it for myself. For my own sense of sanity, wellbeing, and contentment. It's amazing how much more you can do, if you look after yourself. Not permanently of course, (all bursts of energy come to an end), but I can carry so much more weight on my shoulders without my feeling of okay-ness getting squashed. It is not selfish to look after yourself, it enables you to be there for others and yourself, and begin to flourish.
Throughout the 'life' of this blog I hope to share my observations and experiences, my tips and tricks, recommendations and reflections on the subject of 'self-care'. It is an on-going personal challenge for me, and something I wrestle with on a daily basis: remembering to take time for my own needs so I don't crash and burn. On this journey of caring for others, and learning to care for myself, I am certainly learning what works, and what the challenges are. Please feel free to comment and contribute your thoughts and experiences with the topics I cover.
Posts in this series so far:
